Getting Ready in a Flash

How's everyone doing on this gloomy Monday? It's a nap day, isn't it? I'm being propelled forward by the excitement that it's the season finale of The Bachelor tonight. My girlfriends and I are getting together to watch it, so it's bound to be a fun night. Ben is probably the nicest and least shady bachelor they've ever had, which also means he's boring as all hell. I'm hoping there's some good shit-stirring tonight to keep it exciting. And before you say anything, yes, I know The Bachelor is one of the more misogynist and anti-feminist shows on TV. I'll just direct you to this classic piece by The Onion. (It's also applicable to The Bachelor, but let's be real, I watch Say Yes to the Dress too.) I'll make up for it by reading three feminist books this week, okay?

I am trying to be eat healthy dinners despite the fact that I'm cooking for myself this week, so I'm gonna race home from work and start cooking some farro for a salad. I've decided my approach to my meals this week will be to make a salad every night, that way I can have it for dinner and Theo can have the leftovers for lunch. I'm hoping I have time for a shower tonight but I may not have time. SORRYYYYY. It's more important that I not miss a second of the show. Listen, sometimes you just don't have time for a full shower between work and the next activity, and if you have a relatively physically demanding job as I do you have to try to pull yourself together and make yourself presentable without having to either lug your makeup bag around or take a lightning-round shower. I've gotten pretty good at making myself look like a human with minimal products, so I figured I'd share my little tricks with you!

First things first, you can't be stinky. I have a two-pronged approach to this: I always have a tiny jar of deodorant with me because I can't bear the thought of smelling like a sand-pit when I'm out with friends. Meow Meow Tweet's smaller container of their baking soda-free deodorant is perfect for my tiny bag and smells delightful. (I have a baking-soda sensitivity, but if you don't their regular natural deodorant cream is bomb and you should try it too.) After that I rub a Revive wipe all over my shirt, (focus on them pits) you'd be surprised by how well it works! It takes all smells out of your clothes and leaves it smelling like it just came out of the wash! I discovered these years ago and I always have one in my bag. I always feel better after I use them.

It's rare that I have an entire makeup set in my bag, so I focus on three things for picking myself up. 1. Mascara 2. Concealer 3. Lipstick. Everything else can wait. I love love love Stowaway and always have their products in my makeup bag. It's a perfect tiny size, is easy to apply, and is super high quality. Their scarlet lipstick looks bomb on me, I've never worn it out and not received a compliment. I find the combo of these three products makes me feel put together and like a human being again after a day spent chasing a baby around a filthy New York playground.

Hair wise, these days when I'm in a pinch I throw it up in a half-bun. It looks city-girl cool and intentional, but really it hides dirty roots and keeps it from looking lame. I love my bob, but if I don't style it and make sure the ends aren't tucked under I end up looking like Anton Chigurh. The half-bun always saves my dorky ass. Here is a picture of a model with a half-bun, pretend that's what I look like too.

It's pretty simple, but I really do feel better when I take five minutes and have a little refresher before going on to my evening activities. What are your must-haves before you go out?